30 June, 2012
That noon at McD Sudirman ~
Hanif: You have Dutch blood, don’t you? How Dutch?
Me: Neehh, not much. It’s my great- I don’t know, great-grandpa I think.
Hanif: So you’re… *counting in mumble* 1/8 Dutch then. See, it’s in your browny eyes.
Me: And my skin tone too.
Hanif: What about your Mom? Javanese?
Me: Well, she has Arabic blood. My great-grandma is. That’s why my nose is, well, not that pointed sih, but not bad lah.
Hanif: *cry* Argh, dammit, my skin, my eyes, my nose.. I’m ugly! *sob*
29 June, 2012
“Set me free,
leave me be,
I don’t wanna fall another moment into your gravity”
What if falling is unfavorably desirable?
29 June, 2012
Suatu hari di salah satu kios perak di Kota Gede
Penjaga toko: Mbak, itu kakaknya atau ibunya?
Me: Oh, itu ibu saya..
Penjaga toko: Oohh.. kirain…
20 June, 2012
Nanda : “Aya aya, sedih banget, kita besok dah berangkat ke Bali, dan kamu ga ikut :(“
I’ve finally made my decision! It wasn’t an easy one, really. If it was, the previous post wouldn’t even be there :’)
Thank you to those who’ve been kindly willing to listen and understand.
And thanks to Nanda, it really means a lot :””’)
Aaah I’m so missing my fellow Surakarta debaters!!
9 June, 2012
Being a perfectionist is like a double-edged sword – deadly to both parties, yet still favorable. #masochist (?)
– @ayagratsia, 5th June 2012 –
Don’t you know how suck it feels having to choose one over zillion? Well, not that much sih, but still, each has its own importance, specialty, and sort of force-power I barely dismiss.
It’s not that I don’t want to, instead I want them all! But come on, do you think I can copy myself into seven to accomplish each of them? The thing is, I have to choose, make priority list, include some and exclude the rest. Might be bitter but what else can I do?
We can never please everyone.
That’s the most feasible thing possible. Yet still, each forces themselves to be on top of priority. When can I please myself then?
My satisfaction comes when I do things – mostly which I desire, in a way I want them to be. Perfect. That’s what makes me a perfectionist. However, I sometimes can’t do what I favor, and even so, I still want them to be perfect.
Even when one does me wrong, I want it done in a perfect way as I desire it to be.
Now what to choose? I hate myself being indecisive, but I have to be wise rite? I put aside my impulsiveness for serious matters.
Alif : “It’s simple. Either you do it and do all the consequences start from now, or just don’t do it at all. It’s that simple, Ay. Uhm, wait, I know I know, it’s impossible for you since you’re this complicated type of person, rite? I know, you never changed.”
Life is full of options. Sometimes, we don’t need to over-think things and take them easy instead. But hey, I’m a perfectionist! Dealing with serious matters as simple is not enact-able!
[ problems unsolved ]